Sunday, February 18, 2007

Shadows and Vapors, all the same

Late, very late that same evening I headed back to our rooms. Belda was dillegently working on her homework, which I have to say I was suprised she did so without a fuss. But then again, I saw the split eared grin on her face earlier that afternoon whenever the backs of my ears had decided to turn a very dark shade of pink whenever I missed a step in the current set I was working on and Obi Wan had to correct me.. Sometimes I am begining to wonder if Belda is too smart for her own good..

"She is.. now about our other problem..."


I wanted to scream and split my head in 2! " your not helping right now Catia and it's not OUR problem, it's MY problem. I will deal with this. I don't need your help.!" I was snappish, hungry and exhausted.


Belda looked up from her work, thinking I might be angry at her and a few well placed words had her set back on her work as I headed to the cooking area to make a light dinner for us.


" Look, Catia I'm sorry as much as I do appreciate the help, I want to be able to be able to stand on my own without help from you. There might come a time when you are no longer around and then what would I do huh? Sit and cry like a baby?"


" I'm sorry , your right. it's just I don't want to see what we have crash through the floor like a glass bowl."


I nodded mentally and while I was cooking dinner Belda kept casting glances over in my direction, probably wondering if all the stress had finally made me go off my rocker or if she had done something wrong.

Once dinner was finished, I brought a plate over to Belda and she looked up at me curiously.. " Master Deimos, who was that you were talking to ? "
She caught me by suprise, a good bit.. The only other person who had bee nable to see Catia was..


" I heard another lady's voice in the kitchen with you.. is she a freind of yours?"


I explained who Catia was over dinner. The expression on poor Belda's face was more so wide eyed shock than anything else. Then the topic turned to something even more intresting.. cake..
It seems that Belda's last class right before lunch was halfway across the temple And by the time she could get there, with all the no running rules and all there was hardly any desert left for her!.. Well this simply would not do..


I remembered very distinctly whenever I was younger I would have kp duty once a month.. and somehow Anakin always managed to get into trouble with Obi Wan that day.. of course me being my sympathetic self.. he helps me with dishes, I saved him a good centerpiece of the cake that yes.. I cooked. In my teens I became famous for my triple decker chocolate cake with fudge filling. I would make about 10 of those a month for the temple, and let me tell you one is a lot of work as it was..


So we pretty much came to a soulition. I would make 2 cakes a month for just us to share.. ( and of course if we had company and they were hungry, namely Anakin) so she wouldn't have to worry about it.. And from what I heard from Cin, they were skimping on the filling anyway.
I was just setting the dishes in the rack whenever I heard the doorchime. I went to answer it and I found no one standing there, but there was a sack on the mat. When I looked inside I paled and took into the apartment quickly, stashing it under my bed.


It wasn't until later I was able to see what it was in earnest. Someone had left me all of the holocrons in the vaults, save the Great Holocron which resided in the archives, which was where I would begin my work on the gate. I knew who had done this.. it was as plain as the note inside.. Mace.. in a pathetic attempt to win me over.. Well it wasn't going to work because I wouldn't let him be fooled by his own dilusions. When I reached for the nearest one an image of a crossbreed flashed across my mind.. Something was off..


I called Ms .Nu on my com and asked her to pull up whatever reasearch she could find on succubi and incubi and that I would come see her in the morning.Whenever she asked why I told her straight forward" I believe there may be a danger loose in the temple ..That the council knows and I'm only trying to help.." Satisfied she left and I climbed into bed with a weary mind. But not before locking the holocrons in the chest for safekeeping. I didn't need Belda getting her hands on one of those..


Still my dreams were tormented by nightmares... I find I am getting very little sleep these days and it's showing . But a little makeup never killed anyone, which I'd put some on to cover the dark circles under my eyes.. last thing I need is for someone to give me flack about sleeping enough.. I am doing all I can though I feel like I am being stretched like a ballon . Both mind and body. I really don't feel like I have recovered from that bout of sickness just yet.. Even his grave my brother still makes my life horrid.. huttslime..
Til Later
Pho

8 comments:

padawanbeldapinik said...

Oh my Master... I made it to class ok... This class is so borring! The instructor has such a monotone voice... I am about to fall asleep, but not to worry, Things will clear up eventually. Try to get some sleep my Master?

Phobia said...

*hugS8 I had about 3 classes like that when I was your age.. I have a trick for you.. glassses that make it look like your eyes are open.. I'll have to see if Anakin has any more of those.. I do hope they do.. i do try.. the whole point is that I can't half the time.. but I do try

Master Adana said...

Pho, you need to slow down. I am here to help if you need any.

Master Obi-Wan said...

I agree with Adana. You need to take care of yourself and your Padawan.

Phobia said...

I've been more worried about Belda than myself. I will not allow the darkness to taint her, though it follows at my heels like a lost puppy.

The nightmares grow worse with each passing day and I am desprete to make them stop. I have tired any force methods, but nothing works.. The black panther.. it eats my psyche from the inside out.. if only I oculd have peace , if just for a time.. let my mind rest...

Unknown said...

Take care of her. She'll need you more than you think.

Skywalker said...

Nightmares are hard to handle. If you need me, you know where I am.

Phobia said...

She IS my only concern DJK.. nothing more

Ani.. please, any help you have to give I will gladly take. i can barely sleep anymore.. My only recourse for any peace are methods I don't even want to think of but it's become like second nature to me..